Children's
Fear of War
Children have
a way of absorbing what is going on in the media in many different
ways. Although an adult may believe the last news report was not
frightening, children may think otherwise. Children can interpret
the same event in many different ways.
Fear of
the Unknown
One essential element that frightens everyone is a lack of control
of a foreign situation and a fear of the unknown. First to assure
some sense of control, it is important to a initiate some task
related to helping our soldiers.
You can consider
sending letters, or finding military families to sponsor by making
gifts for the children, or providing the lone military parent
with extra services such as coupons to McDonalds for a night off
of cooking.
Older children
or adolescents may be capable of conducting a review of historical
wars in the past that have similar causes, thus they can contrast
and compare issues and outcomes. Also, it may be helpful to review
the geography of the war, and initiate a learning session where
all family members participate in identifying war-related territories
or planes used or training requirements of the soldiers. Most
of this information can be obtained on the Internet. (See related
educational links provided on www.parentguide.com.) This will
help minimize fear of the unknown.
Feeling
in Control
It also may be helpful to discuss the political pros and cons
of the war, so that a child or adolescent may be able to develop
a personal point of view on the matter. All this information sharing
is helpful in two important ways:
" First,
it gives them a task to do, thus they feel more in control.
" Second, it allows them to put meaning to the war if the
issues are discussed in a rational manner rather than simply focus
on the impact of bombing and potential threats to American civilians.
Screen
News Reports
Of course, last but not least, is to screen television viewing
of news reports and bombing of cities when children are in the
room. Monitor adult conversations in front of children as well.
Family
Discussion
Most importantly, all family members get to discuss concerns in
an information sharing atmosphere, that does not have to project
gloom and doom. If any child is overly upset or anxious including
dreaming or nightmares about the war, then by all means seek professional
intervention as to why the issues are disproportionately worrisome
to the child.
The main point
is, that families must draw strength from all family members and
always remember to be proud to be an American. May we all come
to know world peace without loss.
Dr. Felicia the ParentCoach
F. Felicia Ferrara, Ph.D.
Psychology Services
The Consultation and Evaluation Center
813-259-0303
